Trip to the land down under: Sydney, Australia

The Sydney Opera house in all its glory

After a grueling flight from Hanoi to Sydney via Guangzhou, China we arrived in Sydney.  It was quite shocking to arrive in a westernized country after being in Asia/Africa/India for the past few months. It was bizarre, it was clean, there were signs only in English, there were rules of the road...and people actually followed them.

We were picked up from the airport by Rich.  Rich and his other half Beck whom Will had met during his brief stint in Singapore had agreed to let us crash on their couch for the week.  We were both very appreciative of them to offer us a place to stay, however there was a small glitch. Beck had given birth to a beautiful baby girl Madison 2 days before we arrived.  Don't worry we are flexible travelers- we then relocated to the spare bedroom of friends of Rich whom neither of us had met before (Gavin & Maria), who deserve a hardy thanks for putting up two strangers in their home.

The Three Sisters

We had originally decided to stay only 1 week in Sydney, catch up with friends and move on to New Zealand, where we had applied for a holiday-work visa. So catch up with friends we did, we spent numerous nights out in downtown Sydney (a gorgeous city btw) with the harbour bridge and opera house dominating the views of the water. We were lucky to be able to meet up with a few of Wills friends from his past that all somehow seemed to have converged in Sydney at the same time.  We went to a few bars, hung out at the Opera Bar- a bar just below the famous Opera house with the most spectacular views of the harbour and harbour bridge, and had a great dinner in a cool art-deco styled restaurant downtown. We were also able to take a trip to Bondi Beach which although it was really windy, it was nice to add it to the list of places we've been.

Being blown away at Bondi Beach

One day we took a day trip out to the town of Katoomba in the Blue Mountain range to hike around and check out 'The Three Sisters'.  The scenery was incredible and a good time was had by all.  Other highlights of the week included meeting baby Madison, tasting all the delicious Australian wines we could get our hands on and catching up with all of the friends- old and new. The one disappointing thing about Sydney is that there are not any Koalas or Kangaroos hanging around town, the zoo is close but was not in the budget given the exorbitant cost of everything in Australia. The week flew by and we were soon boarding the plane for New Zealand. Look out sheep and Lord of the Rings- here we come.

The only kangaroo in Sydney

South East Asia: It's Hot, Damn Hot!

Morning traffic: Bangkok

Six years ago I had the pleasure of working in Singapore for 6 months; at that time I had visited Bangkok,  Cambodia and Vietnam amongst other locations in SE Asia.  Bangkok was a noisy hotbed of debauchery with easy access to drugs, prostitution, girly boys and cheap booze.  It was the most similar location to India I had ever been, so I had warned Katy to be ready for some restless nights.

We got off the plane into the clean new Bangkok airport, and were greeted by smiling faces of locals pointing us to customs.  While waiting we all stared at enormous LCD screens giving instructions on the various ways to get to the city center, and opted for the new sky train.  Next we boarded the sky train in air conditioned comfort and were ushered toward the city.  The train was impeccably clean; the patrons on the train were well dressed.  We mistakenly got off at the wrong stop and were immediately helped by employees pointing us in the right direction.  I was in shock from the vast difference between the Bangkok I remembered and this place we were now in, but the one thing that still rang true was the heat.  It was HOT with nearly 100% humidity and it was only 9 in the morning.

Thai Royal Palace

Over the next few days Bangkok became a stop for trip maintenance.  It was cheap, it had great food to offer and with the sky train just down the road from our hostel, we didn’t even need to bother with tuk tuks or taxis.  To be more specific, there was a group of food stalls that set up at the end of our street every night offering various delicious noodle dishes, pad thai, cashew chicken, and curries for about $1.50-$2.00 each.  Katy declared that I was to start a weight gain program due to the pounds I had shed from India and Namibia.  The program generally involved eating additional curries, and drinking beer with the occasional ice cream thrown in.  I highly recommend it.

How times have changed...

When we were able to get away from the food stalls and embassy row we hit up some of the biggest and best temples Thailand has to offer seeing the Royal Palace and many of the Buddhist temples (Wats).  Bangkok hosts some of the largest and most valued Buddha’s in the world.  We saw one made of solid gold, one emerald and one Buddha about the length of a football field. 

Need a Budda?

Aboard a train we left Bangkok to see Thailand’s original capital, Ayutthaya, just one hour north.  The city is surrounded by a river and much like Bangkok, is renowned for its temples.  The next day we rented bicycles and toured the town in the extreme heat.  More temples, more tasty food, and a look at the King’s retreat home outside the city all while working on a good sweat.  Even in the evening, the temperature didn’t go below 80 with the humidity making any thoughts of escaping the heat laughable.  In that kind of heat taking a shower only acts as temporary relief.  As soon as you leave the shower and put clothes on you break out in a sweat. 

We did find relief from the heat when we arrived in Chang Mai, a touristy town at higher elevation further north.  Mind you temperatures still reached the 90’s, but it was below the miserable temperatures we suffered further south.  The tradeoff was that the air quality took a serious nose dive as we went further north.  We were in closer proximity to the rice growing region of SE Asia and they had just entered ‘burning’ season.  It’s cheaper and easier for the rice farmer to clear out old rice stalks by just burning the fields instead of using machinery or manual labor.  This happens across Thailand, Laos and Vietnam for a few weeks causing the skies to cloud over and ash to drop to the ground.  The people respond by wearing face masks around town.

Thai cooking 101

Chang Mai held up the culinary reputation Bangkok and Ayutthaya had set.  In fact we found ourselves in a private (the luck of the draw) cooking class just after we arrived.  A slightly eccentric former teacher / politician / farmer / economist asked us to select what dishes we wanted to cook that day and then showed us to the market.  First we were to purchase everything, do the prep then finally cook.  While we were given close instruction and the occasional helping hand, this was what happened.  Cashew chicken, pad thai, red and green curry, even spring rolls were made throughout the day, and they were close enough to pass for the real stuff.  We were also given a book with the recipes for all these tasty dishes and due to the influence of the Irish manager Western substitutions were given for every item you can’t find when you don’t have a Thai market just around the corner.  

Spring Rolls by Katy

While exploring the culinary opportunities in Thailand, we found a fruit smoothie stall that was constantly packed with customers.  We discovered that ‘Tipp’ had a great thing going on, with simple fruit smoothies, no sugar, no additives, just fresh fruit, ice, water, and the company of a hard working single mom making cheap delicious smoothies.  It was like watching a cooking show, she always had an audience, three blenders going and could slice up a mango or pineapple at rapid speed.  We quickly became regular customers, sometimes making two stops a day (she made a muesli, fruit, yoghurt breakfast for $2.00).

We also elected to get our teeth cleaned while in Chang Mai, as it cost about $20 per person.  A mean game of rock, paper, scissors resulted in Will being the first subject.  I walked into a room with four Thai women ready to clean my teeth.  They shortly ‘prepped’ me by covering his face and eyes and probing in his mouth.  Before I knew it, it was done, told to spit and out the door.  The entire experience took maybe 15 minutes and I think Katy was done quicker than I was (I’m guessing because our oral hygiene is above average for the Thai market).  None the less, it was painless and we survived with all our limbs and teeth too!

We then journeyed north into Laos. Laos is relatively untouched by tourism; it is a country of adorable children, and incredibly laid-back, friendly people.  The lack of safe and reliable transportation is hands down the biggest drawback to Laos.  When we arrived to Lang Nam Tha in Northern Laos, we had left the comforts and commercialization of Thailand.  We were dropped on the side of the road, after hours of bumpy, windy mountainous roads all while being driven in a minivan at breakneck speeds.  In return we were given a dirt road (Main Street) running through a town with more chickens than tourists.  Nestled just 20km from China, the people who had traveled to this portion of Laos broke the mold that we saw in Thailand… no Americans, mostly the well-traveled Dutch, British and some NGO members looking to do some work in the neighboring villages.

Downtown Luang Nam Tha (Laos)

We rented bicycles and it only took us a matter of minutes before we were being chased by toddlers screaming ‘Sai-ba-dee!’ (hello in Laos) through the streets.  The people were real, and weren’t asking us for money or candy or any handouts.  Instead they smiled genuinely and waved.  On our way back into town we found a local food market.  The typical food market in Asia had raw meat, wiggly-jiggly seafood things, vegetables and fruits –some of which we recognize, some of which we didn’t.  But this market was dark, hot and absent of any tourists.  We saw the fare, but what caught our attention was when we saw squirrel and moles for sale.  This country had personality.

Village life- Laos

We found an adventure outfitter in town and next found ourselves doing an aggressive trek in primary jungle.  We started in a village without any sales gimmicks, and then entered a preserved forest by walking straight up.  When we weren’t going straight up, we were going down, and then back up.  In the morning it had rained, so the trail was wet and unforgiving.  By the end of the day I was falling over literally due to exhaustion, (Katy was doing fine FYI).

One of these is not like the other...

Our last day in Luang Nam Tha we volunteered to teach English at the local college.  We met the teacher, whom we could only understand half of the time, then we were given minimum instruction and given a class of 20-30 students each.  Katy had 3^rd year students, Will had 2^nd year and we had a total of three hours.  It was fantastic, the 2^nd year students knew vocabulary but wanted to hear a native person speak the words and pronounce.  Will was able to work on pronunciation with them and make sure they understood the significance of musicians like the Beatles.  Halfway through the night we switched.  Katy was then given textbook made for American high schoolers and asked if she could teach grammar to the 2^nd years, while Will took her 3^rd year students.  The text we had to work with were horrible, clearly not written for students of developing or third world nations; the concept of a fashion model or going to the health club was lost in translation.  At the end of the night, two of the students offered to drive us home on the back of their motorbikes; it was a great evening.

The trek from Luang Nam Tha to Luang Prabang, on the other hand, was not a pleasurable experience.  We were piled into a minivan along with a group of Koreans in matching outfits and the van jetted out of the parking lot.  Our van was piloted by a racecar driver racing through the mountainous terrain and it seemed as though his job was to drive at an uncomfortable pace regardless of conditions.  The roads in Laos were often unpaved and windy with limited visibility.  Every time a truck or other vehicle passed us, our driver made it a point to tailgate them and then pass, only to immediately stop at the next market for him to do his personal shopping.  When we drove through villages and children and livestock were in the streets, the driver floored it.  The driving seemed to be erratic, especially when accompanied with the constant stops for him to smoke or urinate next to the vehicle.  The drive took roughly 2 extra hours over the quoted 8.  When we arrived at the bus station we got out of the van and kissed the ground… we were in Luang Prabang.

Commuter traffic

Joel: every hotel should have one!

It was a drastic change from Luang Nam Tha: the streets were littered with tourists and colonial architecture.  We had landed ourselves in the ‘Niagara-on-the-lake’ of Asia.  Our guesthouse had a 3 month old puppy named Joel, and he made this town worthy of a visit.  We found another opportunity to teach English with a non-profit organization where children and monks came to meet with volunteers on a one-on-one basis to work on their English.  These kids had a stronger grasp on the language due to the frequency of encounters with English speaking tourists.  Some of the participants were clearly motivated.  One of the kids we worked with explained that he would bike into town in the evenings to go to the market, just to meet tourists and work on his English.  He would risk getting jumped by bullies who would steal his bike on his way back from the market as they assumed he had just made money selling things to tourists.

Our last full day in Luang Prabang we were up before dawn scurrying over to one of the main streets.  The streets were alive as we walked through the pitch black.  Locals were setting up the morning market, some with flashlights and some working in the dark.  People set up their fruit and veggie stalls, others hauling out cages with chickens and ducks ready for an early morning sale.  We continued over to the closest temple to watch a time honored tradition.  Every morning in Laos monks walk the streets of their town and receive donations of food that the locals place in their rice bowls as they walk down the street.  This is supposed to bring extra blessings to the people that give food to the monks. Unfortunately this has become a tourist “to do” attraction.  While Will and I stood on the sidewalk across the street, dressed modestly and watched from afar, we were horrified to see a Jeep driving down the road with windows open and flash photography going off paparazzi style.

Monks being pious

Our next stop brought us to the party capital of Laos, Vien Vang.  A river runs through the city and the main tourist activity is to grab an inner tube and ride the river while visiting the series of bars as you ride down the river.  The activity is also internationally renowned, and the subject of a recent Dateline Special because every year at least one tourist dies from doing something exceptionally stupid while partaking in this event… in fact they sell t-shirts in the city saying ‘I survived Vien Vang’.  So due to a combination of the river flowing at a low level and common sense, we elected not to participate in the tubing, and instead found ourselves biking into the villages and exploring some caves… it was equally thrilling and weren’t forced to explore the Laos medical system (that came in Cambodia).

Row, row, row your boat...

The first night we spent in Cambodia Will woke up in a cold sweat.  I was absolutely freezing, and yet Katy insisted I was burning up.  We read through the guidebooks health section on Tropical diseases.  Fever, aches, light headedness… the symptoms matched ‘Dengue Fever’ exactly, so before the end of the day I was off to the hospital.  Fortunately we were in Siem Reap, the most touristy spot of the entire country home to an ‘international hospital’.  At the hospital the nurse outfitted in a bleached white dress, white tights and paper nursing hat attempted to take my temperature by sticking the thermometer under my arm after being in a Tuk-tuk in the 100 degree heat for the past 30 minutes.  Shockingly the result was grossly inaccurate (I had taken my own temperature minutes before we left for the hospital), and when we informed her it was an inaccurate way to take one’s temperature she said ‘that’s okay, we’ll just add 0.5 degrees.  The rest of the experience was only semi-dodgy and blood work showed a miscellaneous bacterial infection.  (The needles were clean, although no one ever asked if I was on any medication).  A few pills and hours of sleep later and I was back in fighting shape.

No look, its a monkey...and you're a monkey

Nobody nose...

To explore Angkor Wat you need to be in fighting shape.  Angkor Wat is one of the world’s largest and most spectacular temples, but the real attraction are the surrounding temples that go on for miles in every direction and take days to explore.  All the temples are outside, so you are subjected to the extreme heat and humidity like in southern Thailand.  For many (hundreds) of years, no one knew these temples existed, Cambodia has a long history of being no man’s land, and the Vietnam war did nothing to aid in making the area accessible.  It wasn’t until the 90’s that borders started opening up and the tourists who risked the occasional landmine got a peak; now the area is considerably safer and the tourists arrive by the bus load, and rightly so, it’s well worth a look.

Landscaper called out

The real highlight of Cambodia came after when we stumbled onto the website LazyBeachCambodia.com, advertising an island off the southern coast that is secluded with thatch roofed huts, white beaches and almost no people.  We were on a boat for two hours taking us away from the Russians and jet-skis that lined the main beach and eventually arrived on an island with nothing but green and blue clear water.  The huts were basic, no fans or a/c, limited electricity, but they did have hammocks and looked directly at the ocean.  Our reservation for two nights quickly extended to three, then four nights, and we only left then because they shut for a Khmer holiday.

Lazy Beach- Cambodia: $40/night!

It didn’t take long, but after we arrived into Vietnam, the nationality of our travel party went from ‘Can-Am’ to straight up Canadian.  We quickly found the people to very jaded toward Americans and were quick to swindle us out of our money compared to elsewhere in SE Asia.  Previously agreed taxi fares of ’15,000’ dong magically became ’50,000’ when it came time to pay.  We made sure to visit the war museum to learn about the “enemy Americans who failed to decimate the unified Vietnam nation”.  The Vietnamese side of the history clearly varies from the US textbooks, still some of the contradictions were fascinating.  An entire exhibit was dedicated to defaming Senator Bob Kerrey (not John Kerrey), who had firebombed a village of women and children, and yet in the states he was a recipient of a medal of honor for the same event.

Another day another dong

When walking through this country, red flags flew on every corner.  Vietnam being one of five countries (Vietnam, Laos, China, Cuba and N Korea) in the world that claims themselves to be governed by a communist party... and yet corporations have a very strong presence throughout the country.  Walking down the street we saw KFC’s, North Face jackets and commercialism at every corner… just under the red (communist) flag.  It seems that the government has a strong presence in all dealings, elections are fixed, and big business is conducted through the government, but people are predominately more concerned about making a buck now than supporting the party.

That's right I'm a biker bitch

We made our way north through Vietnam visiting more temples, eating way to much soup (pho), sweating, wandering around towns and doing the general tourist thing including visiting some of the underground caves where the Viet Cong had hidden during the war.  We were able to get some clothes tailored while in Hoi An for extremely reasonable prices (pending how the winter clothes hold up) - the ladies were shocked that Katy wanted the pants lined all the way to the bottom…”so hot, it is too hot if we do that”).  We also took a tour of Hue which is near the DMZ and had seen a lot of conflict.  Our tour guide was an ex-translator for the US Military.  His English was great especially the over use of the F-word, it was clear where he had learned his language skills.  We rode around the countryside on the back of a motorbike and saw temples, old arenas where they would have tiger vs. elephant fights, and some local landmarks.  It was a really good day.  We finished up the S.E Asia leg of our trip in Hanoi.  Off to Sydney, Australia…but first a 12 hour connection in China.

...only $40 a night!

Namibia: Don't worry Matt Lauer has been here

Its a beautiful morning

Namibia? Where is that you ask. Find South Africa and move your finger north west or up & left. Bamm. Right there is Namibia. A relatively recent country (early 90s) formerly a part of all sort of other ones- South Africa, & numerous colonies predominantly German, but also British rule. What’s there? Quite possibly some of the most amazing scenery & nature we've ever seen. The country is vast with few inhabitants, around 2 million in total, the capital Windhoek around 200,000. From the Atlantic shores, to intimidating sand dunes with sand originating from the Kalahari desert, to mountainous regions, to flat savannahs where the animals play, it is a diverse country to explore.

We landed at the international airport 40kms outside of Windhoek the capital. The airport had 4 gates, and one large piece of tarmac for landing. We then drove through 38 kms of wilderness until we reached town. The changes from India were night and day, for starters: our pre-arranged driver showed up, secondly the car had seatbelts and we were expected to wear them. We had left from one of the most densely populated countries in the world and landed in one of the most sparse. As we drove down the road, for prolonged periods of time we couldn’t see anything except for the stars above. 

After a few days in Windhoek, we discovered a few things: there were almost no opportunities to see the country with public transportation and the guidebooks leave something to be desired. We had looked at what public transit went to the major parks (none), signing up for guided safaris (really expensive), and renting cars to do it yourself. All of the prices in our guidebook were double. We realized this country was not going to be a cheap one. Finally we settled on renting a 4WD Nissan, with camping equipment and a tent attached to the roof, we had it for two weeks and a permit allowing us to cross international borders. Our plan was to drive and camp ourselves around the country visiting both the national parks and anything else we figured might be worth a visit. We planned on making our way to the north of the country driving east into Botswana and finally making a day trip into Zimbabwe to see Victoria Falls.

Watch that last step

The test drive, aka grocery run, was another lesson in itself. When we parked the car, a man approached me and asked if we would like him to ‘watch the car’. We weren’t really sure how to respond… is the crime here that bad that we need to worry about a 30 minute trip to the store? If we don’t give him money, will he call his buddies and have them dismantle the car into saleable parts? It being the first time we’d been asked, and all of our worldly possessions were packed in the truck, we told him okay and ran into the store. The grocery store was another delight. For an incredibly under populated country, the vast majority of its inhabitants seem to spend their time at the grocery store. After battling through the crowds who seem to get delight from running into strangers with their carts, we went to the register to pay. Once at the register, the people in front of us emptied their groceries onto the counter, and then discarded their basket or cart behind them blocking the aisle so we were forced to back up and move the cart out of the way. At first we were confused by what was happening, not sure if we were witnessing a peculiar event, but at every register the people did the same thing. Upon return, our truck was still intact, we loaded it up and headed out of town.

Just before we got lost...

Our first destination was Waterburg Plateau National Park. We reached the park with no problems, set up and camp and wanted to crack open a beer. The one thing not included in our camp pack was a bottle opener. We approached one of our neighbors to see if they had one we could borrow, he responded ‘sorry, in Africa we don’t use the things’, he then grabbed the beer from my hands, and ripped the cap off with his teeth. Waterburg was a good intro to camping in Africa, we got to play with the pop-up tent on top of the truck, test out the 4WD, see an amazing sunset and intro to African wildlife. Our first morning, a few deer visited our campsite followed by a mob of mongooses. Later that day we climbed the plateau, got lost with some of the locals. Next we were off to Etosha, one of Namibia’s most famous parks, with one of the highest concentrations of animals around.

Zebra Crossing

Our first night, we stayed just a few kilometers outside the park; at our camp site they advertised group safaris, so we proceeded to ask if it’s worthwhile. The safari guide had a grim face and said ‘I’ll tell you honestly, its rainy season, so the animals don’t have to go far to find water. At a different time of year I would know exactly where they would be at the different times of day, but now you’ll be really hard pressed to see anything… look at all the Germans sitting over there, all of those unhappy faces, they just spent a lot of money and weren’t able to see what they wanted’. We heeded his warning, lowered our expectations and figured the earlier we got up and headed into the park, the better. Everything we had read said the animals are most active just after dawn and before dusk.

Meow

5am, an ugly hour, alarm goes off, and we start packing up the tent. A quick breakfast and we’re heading to the entrance to the park. There’s a scene in Jurassic Park when they approach the massive gates of the park in their trucks and enter to see the dinosaurs; the only difference when entering Etosha was that it was pitch black and it was starting to pour on us. At check in, someone recommended a certain watering hole for possible game sightings. As the sun started to come up, we were greeted by a massive expanse of land completely covered with zebras, impalas and giraffes. We had quickly switched from Jurassic Park to the opening sequence of the Lion King. After 30 minutes of driving we approached the recommended spot and sure enough, there was an entire pride of LIONS. Five lionesses all sitting together, less than 50 m from our truck. A male watched nearby and then we realized there was another pack on a hill a little further back. Ten or eleven in total, all lounging around having a good time, while we sat in a car just meters away.

What? Everyone has to eat

We then headed down the road to a different location, passing by packs of zebras, ostriches and wildebeest, when Katy spotted a dead zebra lying next to the road. As it started to rain we pulled to the side of the road and waited. We figured a zebra carcass would be somebody’s breakfast so we might as well wait and see what would show up. It wasn’t but a few minutes that two jackals (medium sized dogs) showed up and looked around, and then a single hyena bounded up, looking a bit nervous due to our proximity. While we watched the hyena tore all of the internal organs out of the zebra, digging his face underneath the rib cage, and having a good time. Every time he’d pull his face out from the zebra, you’d see blood on his face and a new bit of organ in his mouth. The jackals just stood by and watched waiting to see if the hyena would throw them any scraps. For the first day that we didn’t expect to see much of anything, we were off to a good start. Later that day, when driving down a side road, we saw a car stopped, as we turned the corner there was a black rhino tromping through the grass. Another big game sighting, and we were incredibly close. He didn’t stick around for too long, but he did give still give us enough time to get a few pictures. At the end of our day, we bumped into the safari guide we had spoken to the night before; he had another disappointing look on his face after a day of minimal sightings. We told him where to go for the lions and so on, then headed back to see if the carcass of the zebra was still around. We looked and looked around where we’d been before and all we could see were a handful of bone fragments, completely clean of meat. 

Yes, giraffes run- almost as awkward as Katy does

It was rainy season, so every day the skies would open up in the middle of the afternoon. This meant a good portion of the roads were flooded throughout the park. We became very accustomed to driving with on side of the car riding 3 feet higher than the other on the shoulder of the road to avoid flooding the engine. Numerous times we scrapped the car siding to bits as we would have to drive through rough brush to avoid the middle of the deep puddles, but we figured if the car rental agency was going to charge us a paint job would be cheaper than replacing a flooded engine.

On the evening of our second day in the park, a storm like no other hit. Thunder and lightning struck all around us and gale force winds shook the entire car violently, there might have even been hail. We were on top of the car in our tent. We sat in silence as we rocked back and forth, both of us independently thinking “do we go down into the car?”, “no, we’ve got our bags in the seats, we’d have to rearrange the car, in torrential rains”, “but will we even survive this, if we stay in the tent on top”. After a long 30 minutes, the storm moved on elsewhere, and we did in fact survive, our tent too, which held up well all things considered.

Waiting for public transport?

A few days later we found ourselves heading over the border of Botswana to Chobe National Park, where encounters with elephants are practically guaranteed. At the park entrance, we were pointed to a Crayola marker map like that your 5 year old can do, that was pinned up to the wall and instructed to be off a specific road by 4 in the afternoon. When we asked why, we were informed that that was the rule.  Slightly perplexed, and without any map to go off of, we headed into the park. Sure enough, we found elephants and hippos down at the river front. As we continued to explore the park, we found a huge herd of elephants grazing and slowly on the move. Males jousted with each other, and babies stayed close to their mothers. Thankfully we were at a safe distance, because one elephant trumpeted and they all stampeded off into the woods.

On our way out of the park, just before 4, we found ourselves on a single track dirt path. Deep woods on both sides, Katy looking backwards, and Will forwards, we both realized we were surrounded by elephants at the same time. Just behind us was a mama and baby elephant; just in front of us… mama and baby. Knowing that you should never get between a mama & baby we planned on staying put. …Until two cars came up on us from behind. A scared elephant ran from behind us and crossed the road and disappeared into the woods. Our cautious gawking turned to fear as mama who had had enough of the tourists watching her babies, walked up to a tree, ripped the top half off with her trunk and charged at us. With no way to go backwards, we stuck the truck in 4WD and sped past the mama, letting her toy with the other trucks. 

Victoria Falls I presume

Our location in Bostwana put us on the borders of Namibia, Botswana, Zimbabwe and Zambia, also where one of the largest waterfalls in the world lies, Victoria Falls. Of course, a native of the Niagara region wouldn’t pass the opportunity to visit a rival falls, so we forked over the exceptionally high visa fee for a day visit to Zimbabwe and got soaked from head to toe, with 360 degrees of water. We also got to see the high safety standards of the Zimbabwe / Zambia Friendship Bridge when we watched a few gutsy individuals bungee jump with a bungee cord threading bare in front of our very eyes. Only a few months before an Australian girl jumped, had the cord snap and survived with only a broken collar bone… or so we’ve been told.  It’s on YouTube if you want to watch for yourself.

Stop staring at me

Back in the truck we spent many hours circling back through the top of Botswana so that we could end back up in Windhoek, Namibia. Our last night with the truck, we found a camp site that butted up next to a farm field. Just before dusk, red beady eyes emerged from the woods on the other side of the field.  They belonged to four male ostriches. All night, making dinner, heading to the bathroom and morning we were watched by these fascinating creatures. They even followed us out as we left the site.

Zimbabwe border patrol transportation inspector

Back in Windhoek we figured we’d try out the public transport options and head to Swakupmond (the more German than Germany beach town of Namibia), so we were packed into a combi van with the locals. We discovered a few things that day:

1.    Sothern Africans, do not listen to good music.  We were subjected to Kenny G, on repeat for a terrifyingly extended period of time, followed by an assortment of soft rock hits, and religious soft-soul music.

2.    Being the skinniest people in the car does not give you more personal space than the others; rather you are allotted half the seat provided to everyone else.

3.    Jerky is a healthy portion of the African diet. Its best paired with a coke, even if you were just were weaned off breast milk.

4.    Thank you, a smile or any acknowledgment is not necessary to be said to other people, even if they play with your child for a 4 hour car ride, and feed him crackers.

Swakupmond was a pretty interesting town, situated on the Atlantic Ocean and lying in the Namib Desert, there is colonial and Germanic architecture, and yet a very empty feeling to it.  The stores worked on vacation German hours (10-3, with a lunch break) and at African efficiency, so by 5pm the wide streets lied empty. Looking one way you see nothing but beach and ocean, you turn around and the beach keeps going on to the horizon. The stores that were open were mostly adventure outfitters.  Swakupmond acts for many people as a jumping point for extreme sports: paragliding, sky diving, dirt biking, and sandboarding. 

Time to get our extreme sports on

When we were picked up the next morning by a woman who grew up in California, we were happy to say that the outfitter we selected would not be at the Victoria Falls Friendship Bridge safety standards.  We were off to one of the biggest dunes outside the city to try sandboarding. This sport involves jumping onto a piece of plywood and barreling down a dune. The crew introduced themselves, and we hiked up some big dunes. On the way we found out this was the tour operator that took Matt Laurer from the Today Show how to dune ski. The way it works was pretty simple, just like sledding / tobogganing back home. You get on your board, point in a certain direction, keep all hands and feet on the vehicle… and go!  By the end of the day, we had clocked over 65kph speeds, and had sand in every crevice you can imagine. 

Due to lack of rental cars in Swakupmond for months on end, we headed back to Windhoek in another combi-which was equally as comfortable as the ride out there. In Windhoek, we adopted a full bright scholar (Anna) who had separated with her boyfriend days before they were to vacation together and explore Southern Namibia. So, back in a Nissan, on the road again we were off to Soussuvlei, home to the biggest sanddunes in the world with a new friend. 

Up, up, up

You know those motivational posters that say ‘Determination’ and show a HUGE dune, going on for miles and miles? That’s dune 49, 49km’s into the national park. In order to drive to Dune 49, climb it and watch the sun rise, you need to be up pretty early in the morning. After driving through the pitch black, then hiking up the crest of one of the biggest sand dunes in the world, to then teeter on the top as the sand falls away from under you on either side we were treated to one spectacular sunrise.  

Further into the park we entered a ‘4WD only’ section, dirt roads turn to sand and we hoped we had enough water in case of a breakdown. We climbed several more overpowering dunes, each with its own personality. One was next to salt flats, others lined with scrawny trees. By dusk we found ourselves at a campsite as close to the middle of nowhere as we’d found on the trip. In the desert, but next to the mountains, the stars shone brightly that night. 

Mountains vs. Dunes

There is rumored to be a road connecting Soussuvlei to Windhoek that does not require a 4WD vehicle, if this is so, we did not find it. On our way back, we were greeted by a sign stating “Extremely high gradient ahead, no trucks or non-4WD allowed”. Our last return to Windhoek took us from desert to an over 45 degree road putting us well into the mountains. In our several weeks of driving throughout Southern Africa, 4WD had only been absolutely necessary when being chased by elephants. This road, on the other hand, tested everything our truck had to offer; with everything engaged we crept up the mountain, offering the passengers one of the coolest views in the country.

Big Sky Country

The last stop in Namibia was a present for Will’s 30^th birthday. We went to a heavily fenced park just outside the city. We walked into the lobby of the guesthouse and took a seat. Katy returned from the bathroom saying “Hey, there’s a peacock out there”, while Will and Anna were glued to the windows just behind our seats. Two cheetahs roamed through the backyard of the guesthouse. We were at the ‘Big Cat Experience’. We ran outside to stare at them through the sparse fence leaving us almost face to face with these animals. 

Impala...it's what for dinner

Our ‘Big Cat Experience’ involved being driven into the deep underbelly of the park, through several electrified fences and then placed into a cage made up of large twigs, acting as a barrier. Our guide started to explain that this park takes rescued cheetahs and tries to teach them how to survive best in the wild. The numbers of cheetahs are diminishing in the wild, largely because they aren’t genetically programmed for survival. Cheetahs kill at high speeds (70+ km/h), but are unable to eat until they have cooled off. By this time, hyenas, leopards, or lions will often steal their kill from under their nose. So, this park teaches cheetahs to kill in packs, rather than individually. As our guide is explaining, four cheetahs are hurtling down from the mountain and heading right toward us. The guide had scattered impala bits around our ‘cage’ and the cheetahs chowed down. Next thing we know, he was breaking the one rule he told us not to break, and running toward the truck being followed by a biggest cheetah in the pack. He gets some more meat and hurls a ribcage at the pack, not before the cheetah gets within a few feet of him.  They attack it together, barking at each other and fighting over the last scraps. After they’ve had their fill, they disperse and we move on. 

Next stop we are on a platform and a male lion appears in front of us. He finds the previously placed impala and is shortly joined by his lioness. This happy couple had been around for a while, he was a kept by a private owner and she came from a zoo.  One time when the lioness was undergoing medical treatment, and he thought she was in danger, he tore a hole in the electric fence to get to her.  Fortunately, she started moving before the exam team had the male all the way through the fence.

Last stop, back to the main lobby for champagne and a personal meeting with the domesticated cheetahs who greeted us at the beginning. We were then introduced to the two cheetahs, allowed to pet them and see run around with the trainer. It’s a humbling feeling, playing with a creature that can tear you apart at the drop of a hat… especially when it starts licking you. As we finished the champagne, it was undoubtedly the coolest birthday present I’d ever received.

Incredible India

Delhi's Red Fort... we think

You always hear that you can 'smell India from the plane'.  That's not completely true, you can see the smell from the plane... when you step off the plane and walk into the terminal it hits you... a potent smell, but not the one we were expecting.  We were expecting that waft you get from someones house who makes too many curries.  Instead we were hit with an overpowering smell of pollution.  We landed at 4 in the morning, and when looking through our windows everything was colored with an orange haze.  Visibility was nothing and we could barely breath.

Humayun's Tomb

After clearing customs and getting our bags we went to find the driver sent by our hotel to meet us at the airport.  Several men waited outside baggage claim with names on white pieces of paper, some on paper torn out of notebooks, some even had signs with company names.  None of which were ours.  We took out our cellphone to call the hotel, our SIM card wouldn't connect with the local network.  We tried to walk back into the airport to see if we could get a signal and Skype or find a payphone, but security stopped us... no re-entry.  Apprehensively we approached the taxi stand with the address for our hotel in Old Delhi and were put into a cab hoping we didn't make the wrong decision.  Looking through the night haze, we sat nervously in the back of the taxi getting our first look at India, probably at its quietest hour.  On the side of the road men crouched around fires, people slept under blankets, and dogs dug through garbage.  We passed various cattle pulling carts on the road, and tried to figure out the rules of the road.  There seemed to be only one... the biggest thing on the road had right of way, nothing else mattered.  When our driver got into Old Delhi he started asking tuck tuck drivers for directions, down a few roads then asking another.  Eventually we found the place.  The reception desk checked us in, and when asked why our driver never showed, he replied that he must not have been dispatched for the evening.  We were shown to our room, which appeared to be clean and went to sleep.  

Laundry on a slow day

A few hours later we woke and were to meet a travel agent to help us arrange trains.  A man in the lobby from the travel agency was there, of course this wasn't the man who was supposed to meet us, for that we would need to get into a van and head to their office downtown.  At the same time, Katy spotted a ratty old copy of a Lonely Planet India.  We nabbed this, went back to our room and figured that we'd do it on our own without any dodgy travel agents.

Street wedding

Thanks to the book, we found the one official spot in the city to attain train tickets was about a half mile from our hotel.  The book also had several pages on 'Dangers and Annoyances' specific to Delhi and purchasing train tickets.  "Don't be dismayed by the people outside the office telling you it is closed and trying to take you to a private travel agency".  We grabbed Will's trusty overly large compass, oriented ourselves on the map and spoke to the front desk to verify where we were going.  "Be careful, people will follow you," we were told and then we were off.

Taj Mahal

The streets of Old Delhi during the day were packed.  Rick shaws, bicycles, tuck tucks, cars, cows and people were everywhere.  From every direction horns blared, and we needed to be careful not to get run over.  It seemed amazing that people could survive to adulthood given these conditions; it would take a miracle to make it without any serious injuries.  As we dodged our way through the streets, we eventually made it to the train station, found our way into the Foreign Tourist Office, and for the first time walked into a place we didn't feel we were being taken advantage of.  We were put onto trains to Agra (home of the Taj Mahal), and from there to Jaipur (the "Pink City").

Built for a queen

The next day we set off to see a few sights in Delhi.  We discovered the subway system to be new and highly functional.  While most cars were packed to the brim, Katy was able to have considerable more comfort as all subway trains have 'ladies only' cars.  At the same time, a little girl sitting in front of Will threw up in the middle of the car.  No one went to clean it up, everyone just shifted elsewhere.  When we left the train station, an assortment of beggars and people showcasing their disabilities set upon us.  Others shouted names of tourist sights trying to direct or mislead us; fortunately we had a compass and knew the direction we needed to go.  The majority of the day was composed of running from one safe-haven, inside of a paid tourist sight, to another, followed by bartering with drivers to get between places trains wouldn't go.  We were quite happy to get up before dawn the next day to leave Delhi.  At the train station, we were warmly approached by an un-uniformed man kindly telling us our train and the next three to Agra were all canceled (screw you too, buddy-you approached us), but it turned out our train was delayed.  After waiting around with some Brits for a few hours we departed the wretched city of Delhi.

Hawa Mahal

Agra proved to be an improvement, but not a drastic change.  We still couldn't see the sun due to a combination of fog and pollution.  The noise and constant harassment started as soon as we walked out our door.  We were able to get a tuck tuck driver to show us 'real Agra' for the day while the Taj Mahal was closed.  Kay-Kay, our driver, was great, showing us sights that easily surpassed Delhi: forts, monkey temples, slums, back door views of the Taj.  All the while, he was willing to tell us about Indian life, what it is to be poor, truly poor and how the environment had changed within just a few years.  The main river Yamuna which flows next to the Taj had almost disappeared, and the pollution made the Taj look like a cloud from a 100 yards away.

Jaipur: The pink city

That evening we sat down in a restaurant above the street next to our hotel.  It was a Friday night, in January... wedding season.  As we waited for dinner we watched a busy street turn into a court for a wedding, lights, food, music.  It was our first glimpse into the incredible culture that India has.  For hours women in beautiful sarees were ushered on the back of motor bikes, and the entire neighborhood came out to celebrate.  When we moved back to our hotel, we could hear every drum beat as the party went throughout the night.

Mumbai commuter trains

When standing in line to the enter the Taj Mahal, I was reminded of an article Katy read me that morning.  The TSA wanted to encourage India to set their homeland security to USA standards.  The people at the TSA need to give their head a shake.  Every time we entered a subway, tourist sight, let alone flew in India we were given the most intense screening we've ever been given, in any country.  Katy was already past security, as separate lines are required for men and women, women's generally being shorter. (Makes up for the bathroom lines =) )  When I finally made it to security I was asked to check my oranges in a locker outside the gates and return again.

Two in... two out

Inside the Taj Mahal was quite impressive, but still covered in a cloud of haze.  As we walked through the sight, we were allowed to go through the 'High Cost Ticket Holder' lines to get inside of the Palace, while nationals waited in a line by themselves.  At most sights, foreign tourists pay 50-100 times that of locals.  Its a double edged sword, allowing locals to access their national monuments, but reinforcing the overarching idea that Indians are not to be treated the same as the rich westerners.  When walking back from the Taj we saw dogs laying in the middle of the road, men would walk up to them, tease them and kick them.  Not maliciously, but to remind themselves that even if they are from the bottom caste, there are things that are below them.

Typical India

The Golden Triangle: Delhi, Agra, Jaipur is the main tourist route for the North.  When we arrived at Jaipur it was the first time we saw the sun since we arrived in the country.  As we walked through the city, the roads were lined with powdered chalk and governmental employees continued to refresh the dulled lines.  Little kites dotted the sky.  While we had many touts for taxis or rick shaws, we were actually able to walk down the street.  We did a walking tour of the town, passing the palace, markets and the Hawa Mahal (a 5 storied pink building with 953 small windows. The original intention of the lattice was to allow royal ladies to observe everyday life in the street below without being seen, since they had to observe a strict dress code of covering their face) That evening, Delhi belly hit Will, and he was out for the count. (Never fear his fiancee nursed him back to health).

Luxury accommodations

Our time in Jaipur was short lived, and we shortly were on a plane to Mumbai to meet Ankur (Will's college friend).  We arrived at the airport and were greeted by our new host as his flight had arrived just a few minutes before ours.

Ankur & Smita wedding reception: Part II

Mumbai is the cultural city of India, Bollywood (India's movie industry) is based here, and it leads a much different pace than Delhi and Agra.  When we arrived at our hotel, which was attached to a Hare Krishna temple, there were evening processions going on inside the temple.  People chanting, drums and music going, it was a different and very interesting scene.  But more importantly, it was access to a hot shower, comfortable beds and the first quiet sleep we'd had in India.  We spent one day in Mumbia being ushered around the downtown in a enclosed vehicle, that night we had home cooked pani puri at Ankur's uncle's house, and we were both shown how to shop for traditional 'ethnic' wear by Ankur and his cousin.  Not to mention, we were able to walk outside our hotel with minimal harassment, all in all, the tone of India started to change and our outlook for the next few weeks was starting to improve.

Temples of Hampi

8am the next morning, we're at a the local train station, rush hour, about to board one of the city trains to a hill station outside the city.  We're watching trains without any car doors pass by packed with people like sardines as Ankur starts giving us a pep talk: "Okay, now when the train stops whatever happens PUSH... every year people die on these trains, two people hop on, two fall off".  Of course, with Ankur, everything is exaggerated, still this crash course wasn't for the faint-hearted.  The train stopped and everyone pushed onto the car with all their might; once on all the locals grabbed up the limited number of seats.  Slightly confused and in awe, we were left standing until the next stop when seats opened up.  The beauty of the India train system is your ability to see parts of India otherwise shut off to tourists, on the other hand, as the tracks act as the largest bathroom in all of India, some things are better left unseen.  A few hours and even more train transfers later, we had made it well outside of the city; a taxi ride, painful horse ride and we were in Matheran.
It was low season for the hill stations, so we planned to show up and find the cheapest accommodations we could, but when Ankur's uncle found out where we were going be, he said he would 'take care of everything for us'.  We didn't really know what to expect, but Ankur had mentioned that there might be servants and it was used as a corporate retreat house.  Upon our arrival we were in fact greeted by the bungalow servant Mr. Budhe (later to be known as DJ Booty) who was at our service.  The bungalow was small house, tin roof, with a living room and two bedrooms, although its cleanliness standards were about on par with the rest of India, it was ours for the next few days at no cost.

Bath / laundry time

Having never had a servant we weren't exactly sure what to do, but we essentially had a side-kick for the next few days, he would negotiate prices for us, scare off monkeys and seemed tickled pink when we would buy him dinner.  We had an extra day in the bungalowas Ankur and his brother left early, in which we enjoyed the peace and quite in the bungalow.  At one point we watched a convoy of monkeys approach the house, scavenging through the brush, eventually they attempted to attack the house.  This was a failed attempt, when DJ Booty showed up and started hurling rocks at the monkey posse.

I hear the music!

Back in suburban Mumbai we had a few more days at our Hare Krishna temple with all the chanting, praying and celebrating we could handle.  We saw a Bollywood movie, (Playerz - a spoof on the Italian Job) and attended Ankur's Indian reception all decked out in our ethnic gear.

Washing my ox

Our next destination, Hampi, was to be reached via 12 hour train ride, then an overnight bus.  The train, if you are able to get the right class of tickets (for roughly $15) was an incredibly comfortable relaxing experience.  On a regular basis, stewards would by and offer us chai ($0.10 per cup) or various food items.  Our favorite offering was the 'chicken lollipop', which turned out to be spicy chicken drumsticks.  The overnight bus was our first experience on a sleeper bus, not nearly as comfortable, but was the only realistic option and we survived.

Colors of India

Every once in a while you meet people you can really relate to while traveling, Hampi was one of these occasions, while waiting for a boat to take us to 'the island' where the more isolated accommodations were, we bumped into a British couple (Andy and Charlie) who were on a similar trip.  Over the next few days we partnered up with the two and saw Hampi.  A stark contrast to urban India, Hampi was rural and unspoiled.  In the morning the villagers go down to the river to bathe, during the day its time for the laundry to be done with brightly dressed women laying out brightly colored swaths of fabric to dry on the rocks. The drawing to the area are old ruins and volcanic rock formations, but it acted as an introduction to the villages and less crowded India.  It was a drastic mentality change, children would ask for pens, instead of money, the hotel service was kind and only offered what you asked for, it was incredibly comfortable.  'The island' was a bit figurative, still tourists could only access it via boat which ran until 6pm.  In the evening, no one could go anywhere, so our lodge played movies out in the open, and everyone stayed in.  As an added bonus, the lodge had a German bakery, we did quite well for the few days we stayed in Hampi.  Unfortunately, just as Katy was mentioning how she was looking like she might leave India without getting sick, she was hit... the next day Charlie got sick too.

Bet your barber doesn't have this view!

Our last tourist destination were the beaches of Goa, heralded as a tropical paradise.  The beach we showed up at turned out to be a Russian trans paradise.  We slept behind a disco which played trans music from 5-10pm every night until the party moved inside.  The main form of transportation were scooters which you could rent without any credential, license, name or down payment (or training for that matter).  After a first attempt which almost landed me in a store front, we had a scooter to take us to the different beaches.  Vagator, the Russian beach, proved to meet our expectations of an Indian beach.  Dirty water, hawkers would come by and bother you endlessly to buy whatever you didn't want, cows laid out on the beach, and the Russians sported some of the most horrendously inappropriate bathing suits you could imagine.  On our last beach day, we made the 20km drive south and found a true tropical paradise beach.  Almost no people, clean sand, and the only hawkers waited for you to find them.

Ganesh

On our train back to Mumbai, where we were to fly out, a little boy was screaming after jumping from a top carriage and falling to the ground, while his parents looked on.  A passenger looked over and then made the comment that 'I have traveled through India for 6 months, and I can tell you this is the largest system of anarchy in the world'.  India was a fascinating, beautiful country, and yet it is incredibly frustrating.  The currently outlawed caste system continues to divide people into those of privilege and those who are treated as insignificant.  Every day we'd see people sleeping on the street, and those who struggle for basic existence.  Because of the number of people, lack of hygiene and sanitation, this seemed to be one of the worst countries to be poor in in the world.  Women are not equals, regardless of caste or color.  Men generally would not look at Katy, and if they did it was in an offensive way.  The lack of hygiene meant it was perfectly acceptable anytime, anywhere to grab/scratch yourself, pick your nose, spit and do many other unimaginably unsanitary activities.  Queuing in the country is as challenging as herding cats; people push each other and can't stand in line if their lives depend on it.  And yet, this country was SO COOL.  The colors, clothing, the music, film, the food and culture were more distinct than any other place we've seen on earth.  Still, the problems in India - overpopulation, sanitation, etc, are nothing to be envied by any nation, and just like everything else in the country, it might not make sense, but will be fascinating to watch.

Cows on the beach

A few random thoughts/stories before we leave you. The first tale occurred while we were in staying in the hill station of Matheran. We had walked into town and were strolling through a park. We watched while a woman swept the dirt floor of the park picking up all the leaves and garbage. She also took the garbage out of the garbage bins and made a pile of everything on a piece of card she was using as a dustpan.  We then watched as she picked everything up and then dumped it over the small wall that surrounded the park, not more than 15 cm from where she had picked it up. It was more like over sized edging really, and if you looked over the edging you could see piles of garbage that dogs were rummaging through.  Apparently it doesn't matter where the dirt/garbage goes as long as it isn't in the area that you are designated to clean up.  Secondly, traveling in India was  divided into two distinct categories: 1) What? That makes no sense, I've already talked to that person, given you money, filled out the form 7 times.  I'm so incredibly frustrated I might have aneurysm or 2) Wow, that was easier than I expected.  There was no in between, ever. The reassuring aspect is that despite the complete chaos at all times, antiquated bookkeeping systems, inconsistent rules and general lack of common sense. Things always seemed to work out somehow in the end. You may have to follow different steps to send a package depending on what post office you visit, you may ask 5 people a question and get 5 different answers-but somehow things get done.  Before we knew it, it was time to get on the plane to Africa. Boarding the plane in Mumbai was quite the experience and in truth could be an entire blog post in itself, needless to say it was Indian chaos at its finest...but don't worry we made it to Namibia.

Bond: Will Bond